Friday, 17 September 2010


A new autumn and a new me, hopefully. Organised. Committed to my goals. At peace with myself. Calm in the face of adversity. Joyful. No toast stuck to my head when I leave the house.

The summer has had very nice bits and very horrible bits. The nice bits have included doing a lot of sorting out and rationalisation of Chickenopolis, including automatic door openers and electric fencing; and spending a lot of time down at Ma's, wrangling pick your own raspberry pickers.

On the downside, the situation between Sister Natalie and B and I has been awful, very hostile and just terrible. Even to the extent of her blocking me on Facebook. And me yelling at her and throwing two small wooden frog-shaped ocarinas at her. I have put forward the idea of mediation and she has said she will 'think about it' - we are hoping that we can build a functional relationship of some kind that will allow us all to be around Ma's smallholding. If not, B and I are going to have to find somewhere else to keep our livestock and therefore see a lot less of Ma; as we cannot cope with this kind of stress every few months.

The children have simultaneous chicken pox and B is away all week, which is why I have more time to be online - I am confined to the house with them rather than rushing around doing things. It's very, very eye-opening how nice and easy it is to spend my time being a dedicated mother, rather than all things to all people. I've enjoyed it, in a bizarre way; although the lack of adult company is going to start to grate in another day or two.

And for today, that is all.


  1. "Simultaneous chicken pox" sounds like a curse. Hope everyone feels better soon.

  2. The situation between you and Natalie must be awful for you all, and especially Ma, who loves and needs and wants to support you all. What does she think? I think that I'd start by asking her for some constructive criticism (on a day you're feeling strong enough to take it) - that you want to know what you are doing wrong and can change. Because, if Natalie is being hostile and unreasonable, she's not going to change first. And whether or not there are faults on both sides, there are causes for conflict on both sides. It will need you to be able to accept anything Ma says without reacting defensively or feeling hurt though - or, if she says it's all Natalie's problem, not to feel justified but to want to help her.

    Hope the children are over the pox soon. Our little one had it recently too.