Friday, 25 July 2008

the truth is ...


I just cannot *cannot* cope with any more. I feel very worn down.
  • The pubic bone pain is there all the time, however I sit.
  • Leo is teething and is all hot and bothered and off his food and has just had an Exorcist Sick moment.
  • The thermometer in my incubator is one degree off and none of my two dozen eggs have hatched.
  • The house is in chaos because the builder hasn't come back yet.
  • We are going to have trouble finding the money to pay him when he does come back.
  • We can't get on and rent the spare room out to get a bit more cash coming in until the house is less chaotic and there is a separate bathroom for the lodger. I don't think I can bear being heavily pregnant / to have just had a baby and be sharing with someone I don't know.
  • Kate and Vic (B's parents) are home from their world trip just after August Bank Holiday. B and I both agree that the best way to head any repeat of any trouble off at the pass is to go up and see them, with Leo, for a cup of tea when they get back. I'm not sure I can however; no apology has been forthcoming from Kate and I am if anything even *more* angry at her for bothering my mother in the two weeks before Pa passed on.
  • We have sat down and looked at our finances. Partly because of the debt that turned bad on us earlier in the year things are very bad financially. Also, our house has dropped in value and we therefore don't have enough equity in the property to remortgage at anything near a favourable rate when we come out of our tie-in at the end of the month. Our mortgage is therefore going to rise by 40%. We are both scared that we are going to lose the house.
  • I miss Pa.
I am not feeling very well. Neither is B.

4 comments:

  1. I wouldn't know how to cope either. I am so sorry - please keep hold of the knowledge that it's the health of all four of you that is the only thing that really matters. You must, first and foremost, be self-protective. I hope and pray that you can keep your house and come through all this all right financially, but it's not the end of the world if you don't. As long as you've got each other, that's what is important.

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  2. I wouldn't know how to cope either. I am so sorry - please keep hold of the knowledge that it's the health of all four of you that is the only thing that really matters. You must, first and foremost, be self-protective. I hope and pray that you can keep your house and come through all this all right financially, but it's not the end of the world if you don't. As long as you've got each other, that's what is important.

    ReplyDelete
  3. The futility of my offering *hugs*....

    Nothing that any of us here say can be of any practical help but you have to know that you've lots of friends here wishing you well.

    And that sound isn't distant thunder - it's my heart breaking for you!

    ReplyDelete
  4. The futility of my offering *hugs*....

    Nothing that any of us here say can be of any practical help but you have to know that you've lots of friends here wishing you well.

    And that sound isn't distant thunder - it's my heart breaking for you!

    ReplyDelete