And then she touched my breast ...
... or 101 reasons why you shouldn't invite your mother-in-law to stay two days after you give birth.
Firstly, thank you SO MUCH everyone, for all your good wishes and good thoughts. I have finally got logged on this morning* and caught up with all the comments and emails. We are both slightly stunned and very, very touched by the number of people who have delurked and wished us well. Thank you all so much, we both feel that we have made so many friends via the internet; some of whom we have never met and possibly never will. I am slightly sniffly writing this and it's not all the hormones :).
Well, I guess the drama is all over now, and it feels odd blogging about it a fortnight afterwards.
The labour and the first week were pretty rough. I have written about it all and I might post it a bit later on when things have settled in my mind. Suffice to say it was thirty-six hours from when the induction started to when Leo actually appeared, the last six hours of which were without pain relief, with him stuck the wrong way round (ie, back to back with me) and me not really able to move around very much because of the symphis pubis condition. They eventually tried a ventous, which slipped off; and they ended up using forceps.
We were both very tired and a bit beaten up and it's really taken all this time for both of us to recover - not having the internet or the phone for so long has, I suppose, given us a chance to do just that.
He is beautiful.
I am having trouble feeding him because my nipples are so sore - so we are 'topping him up' with formula after each feed and I am going to start expressing I think - only I feel a bit weird about it, as if I have udders. We are going to have to see how that works out. I seem to cry all the time I am feeding him - emotion mostly, but also because it's so uncomfortable. I have also conceived the bizarre idea that he is going to be taken away from me and given to someone else to look after.
I am aware that that is an irrational thought and mostly I am managing it - it just creeps up on me when I'm tired and makes me really angry. Unfortunately it's main focus is Kate, B's mother. She came to visit and look after the house for a few days after Leo was born and she was so excited that she wanted to be with him all the time. Her boundaries became pretty blurred and she was coming in and out of our bedroom whilst I was naked and actually picked my breast up and tried to put it in his mouth whilst I was trying to get him to latch on.
Things are okay with her now, though - we asked her to go home a bit early and are taking things slowly with her.
Pa news - he is better in himself, from the stomach bleed, the three infections and the d &v on the ward. However, he now has a clot in his leg and is on a heparin drip to sort that out. Presumably they are then going to get him back on warfrin with a view to discharging him to home, because they don't think the physios can help him any more - he still can't walk. He is very 'turned down' and quite vague and sleepy all the time. He is also refusing to eat very much. We went down at the weekend (military operation, but worked quite well), and at least I feel that I've seen him.
More later. I've MISSED blogging :).
* House news - the move fell through the day before we wanted to complete. We are staying put for a while we think, our heads are too full for anything else at the moment. The reason for the bloggage delay is that we were incredibly organised and transferred all the internet and phone services to the 'new' house. And it has taken them this long to reconnect everything, because, it transpires, they were trying to reconnect them to the wrong house. Oooops.