Thursday, 22 December 2005

extra special present

As an extra special christmas gift to myself, I am reconciling the bank with my accounting software.

I loathe reconciling the bank. I would rather spend an afternoon stabbing forks in to the backs of my hands whilst listening to B's Gran's collection of Mrs Mills Greatest Hits than do it. Particularly since I generally put it off for so long that when I finally DO get round to it, the level of complexity ideally needs to be untangled by someone like Stephen Hawking.

However, I am so scared of our incredibly sarcastic accountant that I have finally pulled my finger out and decided that I need to make a vague effort at appearing competent. So:

  • I went through the enormous pile of filing that has been hanging around since we moved the office downstairs while the builders were here and I have not yet got round to sorting out
  • I found the bank statements
  • I reconciled my software with the bank statements
  • I worked out what we owe people and what people owe us and I plugged the figures in to my other spreadsheet to see whether the graph goes happily upwards or unhappily downwards (it goes up quite steadily for a while, and then it goes over a cliff and crashes somewhere in mid-August, which is okay, because that's six months away and we'll have done a lot more work by then)
  • I printed out the ten pages of VAT figures from last month
  • I printed out sixty three pages of audit trails since the beginning of June
  • I deleted the audit trails I'd printed, to prevent future duplication

And at that point I realised that the printer had run out of ink at about page five in the process.


So I reloaded the back-up copy I had luckily made before I began and I started again.

And now I want to do a 'month end'.

Only something has happened.

Instead of giving me an option to do a 'month end' (which in this case would actually be a 'quarter end', because I am so lazy, but that's a minor detail*) there is only an option which says 're-create review copy for accountant'.

Also, the printer is making a worrying clunking noise.

I am going to have to go and drink cooking sherry until it all goes away.

* See! SEE why I am unsuited to accounting tasks of even a minor nature!

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